I've been pondering this all day. This very question... It can make you or break you. Today it tried to break me. All I could hear was the negative - "you're not good enough", "you're not pretty or smart enough", "you're not skinny enough" and the list goes on. Questions and thoughts we've all had at one time or another.
So I asked some of my family, "Am I enough?" To which they replied, "Enough what?" and "You are wonderful, don't ever doubt it" and "Absolutely you are!"
The question was still raised, I doubted their answers. I just didn't feel like I was enough. You know what? My happiness, peace and joy comes from God alone. How can I be satisfied with the answers I receive here on earth if I'm not tuned in to Jesus through Holy Spirit and listening to what and who He says I am? I can't. Jesus says I am loved, I am beautiful, I am worthy, I am forgiven and I am free. And so much more! God, Abba, Daddy? He says I am His. What more do I need to hear!?
See... We have the power to choose how our moments are played out. The moment that negative thought crossed my mind should have been the moment I told it where to go, that it has no place in my mind, that the only things allowed there are those things that are Holy. But I didn't. You know what? I'm human. It happens. I had a song pop in my mind while in this negative state and thought I would share it with y'all. Here it is :
When I lose my way,
And I forget my name,
Remind me who I am.
In the mirror all I see,
Is who I don't wanna be,
Remind me who I am.
In the loneliest places,
When I can't remember what grace is.
Tell me once again who I am to You,
Who I am to You.
Tell me lest I forget who I am to You,
That I belong to You.
To You.
When my heart is like a stone,
And I'm running far from home,
Remind me who I am.
When I can't receive Your love,
Afraid I'll never be enough,
Remind me who I am.
If I'm Your beloved,
Can You help me believe it.
Tell me once again who I am to You,
Who I am to You, whoa.
Tell me lest I forget who I am to You.
That I belong to You.
To You.
I'm the one you love,
I'm the one you love,
That will be enough,
I'm the one you love.
Tell me once again who I am to You.
Who I am to You.
Tell me lest I forget who I am to You,
That I belong to You, oh.
Who I Am by Jason Gray
Fitting huh?
Father, forgive me for losing sight of who you have made me, called me to be. Thank You for patiently waiting on me to get through my little tantrum to get to that place where I could open my eyes and ears to Your voice. Thank You for loving me, for calling me Your own and guiding me. Thank You for all You've done for me. I love You so much Daddy! Love always...
Your Little Girl
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Mission Minded
8/26/12
Wow, less than a month to go before we will be on our way to Honduras! Seems hard to believe...
As the time approaches, I find myself pondering, "Am I ready to go on this trip? Am I ready to be a part of touching/changing lives? Healing the sick, watching blind eyes and deaf ears open, the dead being raised to life again, etc.. As we make our requests known to our Savior?" To be completely honest... No, I'm not... The first step is admitting it, right?
What made me realize this is Ms. Becky King (Rebecca L King) in her book, "Generational Curses Unveiled". I had started reading the book a few months ago and never finished it (sorry Becky! :)), but I picked it back up this morning to get started again and this caught my eye:
"Then He said to His disciples, "The harvest is indeed plentiful, but the laborers are few. So pray to The Lord of the harvest to force out and thrust laborers into His harvest." Matthew 9:37-38 "You can't give what you don't have! If you aren't healed, then you can't help others get healed, and this is why the laborers are few."
How many of us are praying for the hurt, broken, sick, etc and not seeing many, if any, results? Many of us, myself included, jump to help our neighbors when we have our own junk we need to deal with first. "And why do you look at the speck in your brothers eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?" "Or how can you say to your brother, "Let me remove the speck from your eye" and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brothers eye." Matthew 7:3-5
Sadly, this happens all the time. All we want to see is what's going on in everyone else's lives. "Well she's lesbian, or he slept with so and so, she drinks, he does drugs." The list goes on. My point is this, don't feel like you have nothing in your own eye when you treat people differently because of their sin. The word says, "Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgement you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you." Matthew 7:1-2
Lord forgive me where I have failed You, where I have failed myself. I repent for looking at the specks in my friends, family and acquaintances eyes rather than taking care of the plank in my own. I repent for passing judgement on them in any way. I choose now to forgive those who have wrongfully accused me, talked about me, lied to me or on me and anything else that I have not covered. I choose to bless them now and I ask You to bless them too. I ask You to forgive me now and I thank You that all I have to do is ask.
These have just been some of my thoughts today. Maybe this will touch you as much as it did me. Until next time!
In Him,
Anna
Wow, less than a month to go before we will be on our way to Honduras! Seems hard to believe...
As the time approaches, I find myself pondering, "Am I ready to go on this trip? Am I ready to be a part of touching/changing lives? Healing the sick, watching blind eyes and deaf ears open, the dead being raised to life again, etc.. As we make our requests known to our Savior?" To be completely honest... No, I'm not... The first step is admitting it, right?
What made me realize this is Ms. Becky King (Rebecca L King) in her book, "Generational Curses Unveiled". I had started reading the book a few months ago and never finished it (sorry Becky! :)), but I picked it back up this morning to get started again and this caught my eye:
"Then He said to His disciples, "The harvest is indeed plentiful, but the laborers are few. So pray to The Lord of the harvest to force out and thrust laborers into His harvest." Matthew 9:37-38 "You can't give what you don't have! If you aren't healed, then you can't help others get healed, and this is why the laborers are few."
How many of us are praying for the hurt, broken, sick, etc and not seeing many, if any, results? Many of us, myself included, jump to help our neighbors when we have our own junk we need to deal with first. "And why do you look at the speck in your brothers eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?" "Or how can you say to your brother, "Let me remove the speck from your eye" and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brothers eye." Matthew 7:3-5
Sadly, this happens all the time. All we want to see is what's going on in everyone else's lives. "Well she's lesbian, or he slept with so and so, she drinks, he does drugs." The list goes on. My point is this, don't feel like you have nothing in your own eye when you treat people differently because of their sin. The word says, "Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgement you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you." Matthew 7:1-2
Lord forgive me where I have failed You, where I have failed myself. I repent for looking at the specks in my friends, family and acquaintances eyes rather than taking care of the plank in my own. I repent for passing judgement on them in any way. I choose now to forgive those who have wrongfully accused me, talked about me, lied to me or on me and anything else that I have not covered. I choose to bless them now and I ask You to bless them too. I ask You to forgive me now and I thank You that all I have to do is ask.
These have just been some of my thoughts today. Maybe this will touch you as much as it did me. Until next time!
In Him,
Anna
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Growing Pains
We all experience them. And they are just what the title declares... A pain! Alas, we live in a world that is constantly changing, some good changes and some bad. The good news is we have the power to determine how we will react to those changes.
We can make our lives a living hell by bucking against them, or we can embrace them and make the most of them.
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." (NIV)
And Romans 8:37 says, "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." (NIV)
If we are breathing, then we have been "called according to His purpose", which in turn means that "we are more than conquerors". How awesome is that?!
Also, Deuteronomy 31:6 says, "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them (in this case, changes), for The Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you." (NIV)
So, we have a promise from God that He will never leave us, He will never forsake us. He is one that "sticks closer than a brother". Think about that for a minute... We all have at least one person that we will do absolutely anything for... Multiply that times a trillion and that still ain't going to get you close to how much God loves you and desires great and mighty things for you and through you.
Friends, choose the high road, though it may seem difficult and lonely. We have too many promises that everything is going to work for us to give up now, to throw in the towel. The thing about growing pains? Not only do they go away, but it's also proof that God knows we can become something far greater than we are right now, and so much greater than our wildest imagination and dreams ever dared to let us hope. My word to you? Dream on! Don't give up now, it's exactly what the enemy wants! I promise those growing pains are worth it! Hang in there friends...
In Him,
Anna
"Happiness depends upon ourselves". - Aristotle
We can make our lives a living hell by bucking against them, or we can embrace them and make the most of them.
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." (NIV)
And Romans 8:37 says, "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." (NIV)
If we are breathing, then we have been "called according to His purpose", which in turn means that "we are more than conquerors". How awesome is that?!
Also, Deuteronomy 31:6 says, "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them (in this case, changes), for The Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you." (NIV)
So, we have a promise from God that He will never leave us, He will never forsake us. He is one that "sticks closer than a brother". Think about that for a minute... We all have at least one person that we will do absolutely anything for... Multiply that times a trillion and that still ain't going to get you close to how much God loves you and desires great and mighty things for you and through you.
Friends, choose the high road, though it may seem difficult and lonely. We have too many promises that everything is going to work for us to give up now, to throw in the towel. The thing about growing pains? Not only do they go away, but it's also proof that God knows we can become something far greater than we are right now, and so much greater than our wildest imagination and dreams ever dared to let us hope. My word to you? Dream on! Don't give up now, it's exactly what the enemy wants! I promise those growing pains are worth it! Hang in there friends...
In Him,
Anna
"Happiness depends upon ourselves". - Aristotle
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
A Christmas Miracle
December 25, 2012
Hey guys, I couldn't not share what happened to my mom and I last night. I realize some of you may not believe it, you will just have to take my word for it, because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt what I'm fixing to tell is true. There's no other way to explain it other than God gave us a Christmas miracle.
We were traveling along 117 North, going to Dublin to meet some friends at the movies, already having slightly hydroplaned a few times due to meeting people on the highway and it raining and I couldn't see the road very well, when we got to Caldwell. We were coming out of town, just getting to where the speed limit changes back to 45, when a car that is stopped at the stop sign pulls out in front of us, going straight across. We weren't even a 1/4 of a mile away when they pulled out, just a few hundred feet maybe. I slammed on brakes, knowing there wasn't anything I could do but that, and that we were surely going to t-bone this car, and yes, I'm human, I said sh*t before I realized it... Mama is looking down at her phone playing a game and didn't realize what was happening until I hit the brakes. When she looked up she started saying, "thank You Jesus!" over and over. We both braced for an impact that never came. We both KNEW we were going to hit this car, even as I turned the wheel to the left at the last second, there was no way humanly possible that we did not hit the car. I know that my Daddy was looking out for us last night because we went right through the back of it, not a scratch on us, only a little stiffness from tensing up. As we were skidding across the highway, we never hydroplaned (it was still raining pretty good),not even when I turned the wheel. I don't know if the car ever saw us, they never put on brakes or sped up.
Mama told me on the way home that she almost told me at 5pm that she wasn't going to go, but she never did because she just felt like she needed to be with me. I'm so glad she was, because had she not been with me I can't say that I would have been driving as carefully as I was, gotta take care of mama ya know :). All I could think when that car pulled out was that my mama was in the car with me and I didn't want anything to happen to her. You see, I've lost her briefly already when she fell dead in the foyer of my old church, and that is not a moment that I'm ready to face again anytime soon. Nobody can tell me that God isn't real and He doesn't love me or He doesn't perform miracles. He brought my mama back to life not just once, but twice, and not to mention all the countless other miracles He's performed in our lives, including last night.
I was sharing this with another friend of mine this morning (Casey Hutcheson), and this is the reply I got from her:
"Wow, I had a dream about a bad car crash just like that yesterday at about 6:15pm! In the crash I just knew I was going to hit the car coming at me, but I heard God say, "you're going to be ok." I tensed and braced for impact but then the other car never hit me and I couldn't figure out why it didn't. It was because I was in the shadow of the Almighty!" She then asked me what direction we were going and I told her north and she said that that was the direction she was traveling in her dream. I know God gave her that dream as confirmation to me that I'm not crazy, and that He was watching over us last night. Psalm 91:1 (AMP) says, "He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty (Whose power no foe can withstand)".
Thank You Daddy for being with us last night, and always. Thank You for our Christmas miracle! I give You all honor and praise Daddy. I humbly bow down and give You ALL of me now and I ask You to use me in ways that I never imagined possible. Forgive me for those moments I miss Your still small voice, where I knew I should have said this or prayed that. Forgive me for all my disobedience, as I forgive myself for being disobedient to You. Teach me Holy Spirit, Your ways. Rise up in me as I've never allowed before, I giveYou permission. Thank You sweet Jesus for dying on the cross for us so that we can come and ask forgiveness and be forgiven. Thank You for taking on the sins of this world for us Jesus, You are so awesome and may I never forget that or take You for granted again. I love You so much! Love, a very grateful and humbled me...
Hey guys, I couldn't not share what happened to my mom and I last night. I realize some of you may not believe it, you will just have to take my word for it, because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt what I'm fixing to tell is true. There's no other way to explain it other than God gave us a Christmas miracle.
We were traveling along 117 North, going to Dublin to meet some friends at the movies, already having slightly hydroplaned a few times due to meeting people on the highway and it raining and I couldn't see the road very well, when we got to Caldwell. We were coming out of town, just getting to where the speed limit changes back to 45, when a car that is stopped at the stop sign pulls out in front of us, going straight across. We weren't even a 1/4 of a mile away when they pulled out, just a few hundred feet maybe. I slammed on brakes, knowing there wasn't anything I could do but that, and that we were surely going to t-bone this car, and yes, I'm human, I said sh*t before I realized it... Mama is looking down at her phone playing a game and didn't realize what was happening until I hit the brakes. When she looked up she started saying, "thank You Jesus!" over and over. We both braced for an impact that never came. We both KNEW we were going to hit this car, even as I turned the wheel to the left at the last second, there was no way humanly possible that we did not hit the car. I know that my Daddy was looking out for us last night because we went right through the back of it, not a scratch on us, only a little stiffness from tensing up. As we were skidding across the highway, we never hydroplaned (it was still raining pretty good),not even when I turned the wheel. I don't know if the car ever saw us, they never put on brakes or sped up.
Mama told me on the way home that she almost told me at 5pm that she wasn't going to go, but she never did because she just felt like she needed to be with me. I'm so glad she was, because had she not been with me I can't say that I would have been driving as carefully as I was, gotta take care of mama ya know :). All I could think when that car pulled out was that my mama was in the car with me and I didn't want anything to happen to her. You see, I've lost her briefly already when she fell dead in the foyer of my old church, and that is not a moment that I'm ready to face again anytime soon. Nobody can tell me that God isn't real and He doesn't love me or He doesn't perform miracles. He brought my mama back to life not just once, but twice, and not to mention all the countless other miracles He's performed in our lives, including last night.
I was sharing this with another friend of mine this morning (Casey Hutcheson), and this is the reply I got from her:
"Wow, I had a dream about a bad car crash just like that yesterday at about 6:15pm! In the crash I just knew I was going to hit the car coming at me, but I heard God say, "you're going to be ok." I tensed and braced for impact but then the other car never hit me and I couldn't figure out why it didn't. It was because I was in the shadow of the Almighty!" She then asked me what direction we were going and I told her north and she said that that was the direction she was traveling in her dream. I know God gave her that dream as confirmation to me that I'm not crazy, and that He was watching over us last night. Psalm 91:1 (AMP) says, "He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty (Whose power no foe can withstand)".
Thank You Daddy for being with us last night, and always. Thank You for our Christmas miracle! I give You all honor and praise Daddy. I humbly bow down and give You ALL of me now and I ask You to use me in ways that I never imagined possible. Forgive me for those moments I miss Your still small voice, where I knew I should have said this or prayed that. Forgive me for all my disobedience, as I forgive myself for being disobedient to You. Teach me Holy Spirit, Your ways. Rise up in me as I've never allowed before, I giveYou permission. Thank You sweet Jesus for dying on the cross for us so that we can come and ask forgiveness and be forgiven. Thank You for taking on the sins of this world for us Jesus, You are so awesome and may I never forget that or take You for granted again. I love You so much! Love, a very grateful and humbled me...
Daddy's Heart
Daddy's Heart
So I'm driving home yesterday, listening to worship music and somewhat absentmindedly, I'm singing the song that's currently playing on my playlist. That song is Pursuit from Jesus Cultures newest album, Live from New York. Here's the lyrics so you have an idea of what I'm singing -
Strip everything away till all I have is You
Undo the veils till all I see is You
Strip everything away till all I have is You
Undo the veils till all I see is You
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
I'm pressing in to You so do not pass me by
I'm breaking through the boundaries
I will not be denied
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
Open my eyes, search me inside, I cant live
without Your presence, I can't live without
Your presence
Awesome song right? Of course it usually always ushers me into His Presence. But yesterday was different. It hit me like a ton of bricks... How many times are we singing along with a song on the radio (in this case my playlist), not paying attention to what we are singing? I have a bad habit of it. I tune everything out, usually only listening to the music (instrument) part and being lost in my thoughts, the cares of this world, my wants and needs, my relationships (earthly), my future... Notice a pattern here? The infamous "I" comes into play A LOT... So, I was singing this song and the lyrics came into focus in my mind. My hearts cry really is for Abba to "Strip everything away, till all I have is Him... Till all I can see is Him". My hearts cry is to pursue Him with everything within me, to get to that point that ALL I need is His presence.
You know what I realized though? Every time I am absentmindedly singing these lyrics, or any song that calls on Him for that matter, that He is waiting right there for me, yearning for me to let go and fall into His arms. Very seldom do I turn loose of all "my" stuff... And it breaks His heart!
God, I ask You to forgive me for calling on You and then not trusting in You. I am pressing in to You now Abba, so please do not pass me by! I'm breaking through the boundaries, I will not be denied! I ask You to open my eyes and search me inside. I can not live without Your presence Daddy. Father, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Help me to be more Christ centered in EVERYTHING. I love You so much Daddy!
Love always,
Your little girl
So I'm driving home yesterday, listening to worship music and somewhat absentmindedly, I'm singing the song that's currently playing on my playlist. That song is Pursuit from Jesus Cultures newest album, Live from New York. Here's the lyrics so you have an idea of what I'm singing -
Strip everything away till all I have is You
Undo the veils till all I see is You
Strip everything away till all I have is You
Undo the veils till all I see is You
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
I'm pressing in to You so do not pass me by
I'm breaking through the boundaries
I will not be denied
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
I will pursue You, I will pursue Your presence
Open my eyes, search me inside, I cant live
without Your presence, I can't live without
Your presence
Awesome song right? Of course it usually always ushers me into His Presence. But yesterday was different. It hit me like a ton of bricks... How many times are we singing along with a song on the radio (in this case my playlist), not paying attention to what we are singing? I have a bad habit of it. I tune everything out, usually only listening to the music (instrument) part and being lost in my thoughts, the cares of this world, my wants and needs, my relationships (earthly), my future... Notice a pattern here? The infamous "I" comes into play A LOT... So, I was singing this song and the lyrics came into focus in my mind. My hearts cry really is for Abba to "Strip everything away, till all I have is Him... Till all I can see is Him". My hearts cry is to pursue Him with everything within me, to get to that point that ALL I need is His presence.
You know what I realized though? Every time I am absentmindedly singing these lyrics, or any song that calls on Him for that matter, that He is waiting right there for me, yearning for me to let go and fall into His arms. Very seldom do I turn loose of all "my" stuff... And it breaks His heart!
God, I ask You to forgive me for calling on You and then not trusting in You. I am pressing in to You now Abba, so please do not pass me by! I'm breaking through the boundaries, I will not be denied! I ask You to open my eyes and search me inside. I can not live without Your presence Daddy. Father, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Help me to be more Christ centered in EVERYTHING. I love You so much Daddy!
Love always,
Your little girl
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